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So I’ll keep track on my own blog I guess and see how far along I get.

Problem 1:

If we list all the natural numbers below 10 that are multiples of 3 or 5, we get 3, 5, 6 and 9. The sum of these multiples is 23.

Find the sum of all the multiples of 3 or 5 below 1000.

And my solution, in PHP:

$sum = 0;

for($i = 0; $i < 1000; ++$i)
{
  if(!($i % 3) || !($i % 5))
  {
    $sum += $i;
  }
}
echo number_format($sum);

Answer: 233,168

1. Set up your project
2. Set up your remote preview server
3. Set up an (S)FTP deployment connection, make sure you check “Automatically sync my changes”
4. Go into your Connections in your project, select the connection you just set up in step 3 and switch it from Remote to Filesystem

Now when you save your file, it will automatically be copied over to your server via mapped drive instead of uploaded through FTP.

As far as I can tell, the only place the “Automatically sync” option appears is in the “Create a FTP connection” dialog, but once you create the FTP connection, you can change it to a Filesystem connection and the sync option remains and works.

Long story short this is how I got SVN 1.4 to work with Aptana 3.0. There’s probably an easier way, but I couldn’t find it after too much time fiddling with it, so I’m documenting it here.

• Download Easy Subclipse 1.2.4 exe for for EasyEclipse 1.3
• Make sure you exit Aptana
• Rename “AptanaStudio3.exe” to “eclipse.exe”
• Run (double-click, etc) Easy Subclipse 1.2.4 exe and step through install wizard
• Rename “eclipse.exe” back to “AptanaStudio3.exe”

So now I have a Aptana 3.0 using SVN 1.4 which means I don’t clobber my co-workers’ working copies. Woot.

anything installed?

~ $ which ruby

nope, ok…

~ $ sudo apt-get install ruby
The following NEW packages will be installed:
libreadline5 libruby1.8 ruby ruby1.8

hmm, ruby 1.8? let’s try to get the current version, 1.9.2
just for grins…

~ $ sudo apt-get install ruby1.9.2-full

nothing. hmmm, refinerycms.com suggests we use rvm (whatever that is) and so do random interneteers linked to http://rvm.beginrescueend.com/rvm/install/
hmm, wants me to download and run a shell script i think

but we need curl to do that

~ $ sudo apt-get install curl

now we can view the install script and see exactly what it does …

~ $ curl http://rvm.beginrescueend.com/releases/rvm-install-head

it also needs git, so make sure git installed, yep but if not, you have to apt-get install git-core (not “git” like you would think)

~ $ which git

now we can install rvm … i think

~ $ bash < <( curl http://rvm.beginrescueend.com/releases/rvm-install-head )

make sure rvm installed correctly

~ $ type rvm | head -1

it’s installed but it doesn’t do anything

~ $ rvm

a bunch of text scrolled by really fast when it installed, better go back and read it…

ah, rvm post-install instructions tell us to close current shell and open a new one…
and that we need to add something to our bash profile…
and that we also need to install the following in order to install ruby…
good grief…

~ $ sudo apt-get install build-essential bison openssl libreadline6 libreadline6-dev curl git-core zlib1g zlib1g-dev libssl-dev libyaml-dev libsqlite3-0 libsqlite3-dev sqlite3 libxml2-dev libxslt-dev autoconf libc6-dev

now we can install ruby version 1.9.2

~ $ rvm install 1.9.2

tell rvm to use the ruby we just installed

~ $ rvm use 1.9.2

check we are using the ruby version we just installed

~ $ ruby -v
~ $ which ruby

eh, make this version of ruby the default whenever we invoke ruby in a shell

~ $ rvm –default use 1.9.2

install rails!

~ $ gem install rails -v 3.0.4

here’s where it gets confusing ;) not sure when to create the gemset

~ $ rvm gemset create refinery
‘refinery’ gemset created (/home/dv/.rvm/gems/ruby-1.9.2-p180@refinery).

~ $ cd dev
~/dev $ mkdir refinery-demo
~/dev $ cd refinery-demo/

create .rvmc file that refinerycms.com recommends

~/dev/refinery-demo $ echo ‘rvm use –create ruby-1.9.2-p180@refinery’ > .rvmrc

but now we have to install a gem … maybe should have created that gemset after this command?

~/dev/refinery-demo $ gem install refinerycms
23 gems installed

hmm, ok, lets delete that gemset we created earlier…

~/dev/refinery-demo $ rvm gemset delete refinery

…and recreate it now that we installed the refinerycms gem

~/dev/refinery-demo $ rvm gemset create refinery

now generate our refinery rails demo app

~/dev/refinery-demo $ refinerycms rickrockstar
Running: /home/dv/.rvm/rubies/ruby-1.9.2-p180/bin/ruby -S rails new “/home/dv/dev/refinery-demo/rickrockstar” –database sqlite3 –skip-test-unit –skip-prototype
———
Refinery successfully installed in ‘/home/dv/dev/refinery-demo/rickrockstar’!

Installing gem requirements using bundler..
…
Using rails (3.0.4)
…
=== ACTION REQUIRED ===
Now you can launch your webserver using:

cd /home/dv/dev/refinery-demo/rickrockstar
rails server

ok, it says we’re ready to rickroll!
but what’s this scary warning? “not yet trusted”?

~/dev/refinery-demo $ cd rickrockstar
===============================================================
= NOTICE: =
===============================================================
= RVM has encountered a not yet trusted .rvmrc file in the =
= current working directory which may contain nasty code. =
= =
= Examine the contents of this file to be sure the contents =
= are good before trusting it! =
= =
= Press ‘q’ to exit the reader when finished reading the file =
===============================================================

(press enter to continue when ready)

Examining /home/dv/dev/refinery-demo/.rvmrc complete.

================================================================
= Trusting an .rvmrc file means that whenever you cd into the =
= directory RVM will execute this .rvmrc script in your shell =
= =
= Now that you have examined the contents of the file, do you =
= wish to trust this .rvmrc from now on? =
================================================================

(yes or no) > yes
Using /home/dv/.rvm/gems/ruby-1.9.2-p180 with gemset refinery

now lets try to start up rails … WTF, not installed?

~/dev/refinery-demo/rickrockstar $ rails server
The program ‘rails’ is currently not installed. You can install it by typing:
sudo apt-get install rails

double check some stuff…

~/dev/refinery-demo/rickrockstar $ which ruby
~/dev/refinery-demo/rickrockstar $ rvm info

ok, maybe this gemset stuff is confused? lets get out of this ‘refinery’ gemset somehow
get rid of that .rvmrc file…

~/dev/refinery-demo $ mv .rvmrc dotrvmrc

delete the gemset…

~/dev/refinery-demo $ rvm gemset delete refinery

… and try rails again … yes, it’s there

~/dev/refinery-demo $ which rails
/home/dv/.rvm/gems/ruby-1.9.2-p180/bin/rails

try to start up the server again… Success!

~/dev/refinery-demo $ cd rickrockstar/
~/dev/refinery-demo $ rails server
=> Booting WEBrick

That was easy.

As for the 5k race today, it was a mixed bag. A PR, but still short of the sub-17. I really thought I was gonna do it, the sub-17, with splits of 5:18 and 5:28 according to the Garmin. But the Garmin miles were 20 meters short of the mile markers, so my true pace was probably a little slower. At mile 3 I was around 16:30 and thought, “there’s no way.” Maybe it was that thought that sabotaged me. Whatever, the final gun showed 17:03. Overall, I’m pleasantly surprised considering my training this last month has been very low key. I think I’m still coasting on residual fitness from the dual marathons of 2009.

The goal for the summer is to run as much as possible, not worrying too much about “training.” Lots of miles, some tempos, threshold runs, fast finish long runs, just running by feel mostly, not overdoing any workouts. From there it’s either the S.A. marathon again in November or Houston in January, depending on where my training and motivation takes me.

I’m on my fourth Linux distro in a month (openSuse is holding up so far). They don’t make it seamless.

First let’s recap recent events. I ran the Cowtown Half-Marathon in Ft. Worth on Feb 27th with several college friends. I trained pretty hard and had some excellent workouts, the best being an 18-miler with the last 6 under half-marathon pace. That told me I was ready. The race itself I’d count as a success, but more memorable was the weekend with the friends. So not only did i run a PR 1:17:40 and finish 10th overall, I got to have a sleepover with my fellow near 40-year olds.

Revisiting the race, I’ll just say that I ran hard from the gun, hard the whole way, and hard enough to puke at the finish line. A good course, the first mile downhill (5:35ish for me I think), mostly flat, a few hills around 10k, a slight uphill around 10 miles where a high school kid passed me, then a merge with the 10K runners for the finish where I put on a 1.1 mile kick (ha) and overcame the high schooler.

After the half I contemplated shutting down the training for the spring, so took it easy for the next few weeks. I think I even had a 15 mile week in there. But a few days before the Capitol 10,000 I decided to run and wasn’t expecting anything spectacular. I thought I might break 36:00 on residual fitness alone and that’s exactly what happened: 35:50 for 31st overall. My first two miles were around 5:35 while my later miles were 5:50ish. Oh well, it was a good painful.

So somewhere in there I decided to try and keep fitness through racing. I think the Cap10 was part of the plan, and I signed up for the Bun Run as well. I’m thinking that was a mistake as this week I’ve totally bombed my workouts. I even showed up for the bomb run, but there were no bombers, so I bombed solo, and boy did I bomb. I struggled to run five miles and ended up doing a lame fartlek/mile repeat workout. The Bun Run does not look promising.  But this happens every year around this time, a hard crash after a Spring peak. When it happens it is not pleasant and you end up doubting your whole fitness future.

Anyway, if I ever recover my plan is to run either S.A. or Houston. I train better with looming goals so I think S.A. may be optimal since Houston seems so far away, across the holidays and into another year, but we’ll see how summer training goes. From there it’s not too far to the Masters division and I’d love to give that a shot for a year or two, but that’s getting ahead of ourselves.

I’ve run one race, a 5K a couple weeks ago, since the San Antonio Marathon in November. Finished third in a PR of 17:09. An ok run, but not a great race. I wasn’t really competitive mentally, either preparing for it or racing it. Wanted to hang around and do my best, but I never thought I had a shot, and got outkicked by 10 seconds in the last 400 meters. Afterward I paced a friend the last eight miles of the marathon. Highly recommended, pacing. All the glory, none of the pain.

I still want to break seventeen in a 5K, but it’s not a huge priority (and those next 10 seconds are daunting, much like a donut). In fact, motivation for anything less than a marathon is hard to come by. I don’t run much in the morning anymore (ok, a couple of doubles here and there). Mostly lunchtime and afternoon runs. I hardly make it to any Gazelle workouts and do most of training solo based on a book. That will have to change as I’m coaching little league and flag football this spring and the better half wants to train for a tri.

Average weekly mileage so far this year around 50 I guess, high of 70ish. Most memorable workout this period was a 17 miler ending with 3x2mile on the track just under HM pace. For whatever reason, my easy runs are quite a bit faster than pre-SA, though my workouts aren’t necessarily faster. I think I’m still running off fitness built during the “great marathon build-up of ’09″. Suppose I’ll cannibalize that for as long as possible, in some sort of Ritzenheinian strategy to race faster shorter races after extended marathon training.

I’m racing the Cowtown Half-Marathon on Saturday.

On April 2nd, 2009 her brother forwarded a chain email full of “Awesome Photos”. At the time Jessica didn’t even look at the email but today her sister looked at the email (takes her awhile to check her email?) and saw Jessica’s picture of Friday in the email. Huh?

So how did a photo from Jessica’s iPhone that was taken in late March and never uploaded to the web end up in a chain email a few days later on April 2nd?

It gets even stranger.

The photo appears on this website which claims to have posted it on February 22, 2009, a full month before the photo was even taken! The explanantion here must be that the date on that webpage is wrong, or it’s actually a different photo that looks exactly the same.

In fact, there are other photos (february 2, 2006) that are remarkably similar.
The photo from that site (shown below) looks very similar, but is subtly different. Not Mr Friday:

Now Jessica’s photo is all over the web, as you can see here and here.

But still the question remains … how does a photo from Jessica’s iPhone end up on the web if it didn’t ever leave her iPhone? I guess the most likely explanation is that Jessica actually emailed the photo (iPhone didn’t have MMS at the time) to someone and doesn’t remember doing so. And whomever she emailed it to felt it was ok to forward on the photo or post it to the web without her permission.

Bizarre.

The lead-up week looked like this: 21 total, a couple of short MGP pace workouts, lots of food and drink, and a long, drawn-out test of patience. By the middle of the week I was eating lots of couscous, drinking non-stop shots of double saturated Gatorade, and itching to run. Thursday and Friday were supposed to be zero mile days, but just for the sake of routine and sanity, I ran for 10 minutes each morning. After swearing off the Aussie carb-load trick at Boston, I succumbed to it again on Saturday, but didn’t sweat the exact amounts. I drank five of these 100 carb drinks in the 24 hours between my Saturday morning sprint and the marathon. Plus a big breakfast (waffles/cereal), normal lunch (couscous) and dinner (Quesadillas/rice), lots of gatorade all day, and woke up at 2 and 3 am to down more Gatorade and Clif bars.

The original plan was for me to stay with a friend in S.A. and the family drive down to cheer the morning of the race, but at the last minute we decided to get a hotel. Lucked into one right on mile 8 and it worked out great for all of us. Jess and E got to walk to the Alamo, J and myself lounged in the room. Sunday morning I woke for good at 4:30am and walked 10 minutes to the shuttle buses (after hearing horror stories from 2008 I wanted to make sure transportation was a no-stress part of my race). Later, the family was able to just walk out the door and be on the course.

Walked right on to the bus, a short ride, then a 10 minute walk to the start area. Two hours before start time, I picked up a bagel and some bottled drinks, then parked under a tree to try to nap. An hour to go I did the potty thing, the bag drop off, and headed up the 34 corrals to the start. Feeling calm but ready, both the good and the banal on the loudspeakers began to move me. I noticed all the nervous energy around me, the people laughing, the sincere well wishes, the hugs and kisses. I was glad to be where I was, I was where I was supposed to be.

A few fun minutes with the training crew … Mario, John, Farshid, Jesus, Madison. Would have really liked to see Woo. Another quick potty behind a building and back and time to focus. One last mental reminder of what this is about: not me, not my will but Thine be done. Be who you are, express what you have and enjoy the experience.

Finally we’re off, I’m with Mario, it’s a bit crowded, too much weaving, looking around, I don’t have much idea what to expect from the course. I’d made a last minute decision to carry a cytomax bottle and skip the craziness that usually accompanies early water stops. First mile in, I regret the decision and chunk the bottle. From here on home hydration routine works out to about one Cytomax cup and 2 cups of water each stop. Sometimes more, sometimes less, often one of the cups gets dumped over the head.

I’m trying to stay with Mario but the crowd is thick. Move around some runners, through some others. I don’t know the turns or tangents so I’m moving outside, then inside, then to the curb and back. Wasted movement and I tell myself not to get antsy or annoyed. Already my borrowed Garmin is way ahead of the course. I notice a couple other Gazelles running with us, Madison up ahead. I don’t feel comfortable yet, no rhythm, it feels like we’re a little fast. Mario and I keep reminding ourselves to stay relaxed, to back off, it’s a long race.

At this point I think Mario seems stronger than me and wonder if I can keep up. I tell myself to just hang on to his shoulder. After one water stop he pulls away and I have to speed up to catch him. I decide it’s worth it. I can’t thank him enough for leading the way through the first half. I didn’t feel great the first 10 miles but just keeping up with him helped me immensely.

Somewhere in these miles I first notice a red-haired girl in a red running skirt a hundred meters ahead. You don’t see many of either in a marathon and the combination is striking. She’s running with a guy in a cross-country jersey and I assume she is a college girl running the half.

No real spectators until mile seven or so. I’m noticing the bands though and I like them a lot. The songs give me energy. I take time to listen and to look. Seems like every one has a female singer.

Lots of turns and I notice again the Garmin is already way off. A little frustrating because even though I’m running 6:20ish pace by my Garmin, the course clock shows 6:30 pace. That means I’m running too far, not hitting the tangents. I make a mental note to pay more attention.

Mile seven through the city and I see the Gazelles cheering brigade. Big boost. A hard right and I nearly get cut off at the corner. Mile eight past our hotel and I look for the family but they’re not there. Around the corner and there they are. Always a speed shot to see the family, I give them a little fist pump. Turns out the fist pump becomes my “thing” this race. I’m starting to feel strong, the energy is flowing, I’m happy to be doing what I love and doing it well. I’m thankful for the spectators, the bands, the cheerleaders, the volunteers the families on their porches, the passersby oblivious to the spectacle. I give a lot of fist pumps to all of them. I’m feeling good.

We turn the corner to head south on mile ten and the wind hits us. If you weren’t running you probably wouldn’t notice it but we immediately notice it and our pace slows a couple seconds per mile. We see Gilbert for another big boost. He admonishes us to stay strong, keep hydrated, to work together.

The split off for the half runners is here and I see the red skirt girl stay for the full and I’m kind of shocked. I don’t know why, I shouldn’t be, lots of girls are faster than me, but she seems so strong. I think she must be going for an Olympic Trials qualifier (2:47).

Somewhere in here we see Jonathan D from Gazelles. He runs along side with a happy aura and wet towels. “Here, keep cool, don’t worry and just throw them down up ahead.” I’m not sure if it was his demeanor, the small actions, or the unselfishness but the encounter with him really moved me. I feed off his awesomeness and I’m jacked up now more than ever. Thanks Jonathan.

The splits are clicking off. We’re passing other runners pretty consistently. Most of them seem to really be struggling. We passed a guy from Chile who’s breathing really hard. He latches on to my shoulder for a few seconds which annoys me enough to make me speed up. We pass a young dude who is working really hard and asks us what we’re shooting for. I say nothing but Mario manages a short “twofitty”. Shortly after this Mario says, “this is really hard.” I respond, “yeah, you want to take turns blocking the wind? Get behind me.” I think I hear him say, “ok” but I’m not sure. At any rate that’s the last I’m with him. I debate momentarily if I should stay with him or go, but I’m feeling it and I’m here to run my race. But again, not enough thanks for Mario.

By the half I’m 15 seconds ahead of Mario, I see him on some turns then one final look back and I don’t see him again. I turn my concentration to the runners up ahead. There are a lot of them coming back to me. It seems like it’s a tough day for most but I don’t seem to be affected. I’m starting to dump water over my head and into the wind I even feel a little chill. My energy is full, spirits are high, I’m holding myself back from really going for it. I keep reminding myself of what my 2:29 friend says: “Everyone feels great through 18.”

I see red girl grab a bottle off the elite table. She’s elite!? Immediately she turns around and puts it back. She’s clueless?! Soon she pulls away from her running buddy and is in and out of my sight. Fuck she’s running strong. I vow to keep a bead on her and chase her to the end. It’s desolate out here on the back half and she’s my siren on this day.

Mile 16, a short U-turn, and I’m shocked to see Madison coming the other way. He should be way ahead. Turn another corner, I see him walking and I’m saddened. He stops and starts and stretches and I pass him reluctantly. For a split second I wonder if I should stop but he has a running partner and doesn’t seem to be in any danger so I ask him if he’s alright and I keep running.

Another corner and … there’s nothing. No runners, no cones, no spectators. I wonder if I missed a turn. I couldn’t have, just keep running. Soon enough I’m back among the world. I see red girl. I’m passing more runners. I’m trying hard to contain my excitement. Still a long way to go. But I feel strong, energetic, happy, excited, joyous. This is how it’s supposed to go and I wish everyone felt this way. I remind myself to be grateful, that it’s not my ability, I’m just the expression. Grace is the word I’m looking for.

“I can work harder than this, it feels like I’m just jogging. Should I be working harder?” I didn’t want to get greedy but the thoughts are hard to fend off. I love the cheerleaders, I like the bands. I fist pump and high five. Mile 20 and red girl is coming back to me. Finally I catch her and say, “I’ve been chasing you all day. You’re running so strong.” She replies, “well, you caught me and now I’m dead, so you better go.” I can’t tell if she’s pissed or encouraging. Unsure, I take off. I looked her up later and saw she ran 2:52. Well run race red girl, well run. And thank you for pulling me through 20 miles.

Now the sun peeks out and I immediately feel the difference. I pass a guy who is drenched and he takes off his shirt. I say something about the wind in our face both ways, he says something about the sun and humidity. It’s the first I really notice it. I’m drenched too. I consider de-shirting but want to represent the GZL and don’t want to carry the shirt. Fortunately the sun hides behind the clouds again and that’s the last I think about it.

Mile 21 and I see the same Gazelle brigade as before. I pick it up, give a fist pump, they’re yelling … and my hamstring twinges. Oh crap. But it’s just an instant and it passes as quick as it came. I hear Kevin say something like, “holy sh**, he’s like top 20 or something!” This is the first idea I get of how well I’m doing. It gives me a momentary boost but again I remind myself to stay humble and patient. I had told myself to make it to 20 then try to light it up the last 10k. I’ve pushed that back to the last 4 miles. I’m running so well there’s no need to get greedy.

Suddenly I notice I’m hungry. I took a Gu at 5, 13, and 18 and decide to take my last one even if it’s too late to have any effect. It seems to work because I never think of it again.

Mile 22 and I merge back against the marathoners still heading out at mile 12. More energy from their cheers. I lock on to a couple guys 1/4 mile ahead. I like the lack of turns and the long straight empty road ahead.

Mile 24 merges with the half runners still finishing up. Thank goodness they have the street separated. Unlike Dallas White Rock where I had to weave and bob and scream and cry my way through hordes of half’ers, I have half the street to myself. Then Gilbert is there with a bullhorn and the energy of a supernova. He’s screaming at the few half-runners moving into my lane. He’s yelling at me to keep strong. “Iyo ngwe! Iyo ngwe!” I get so geeked up I drop the pace, I’m feeling it, yeah baby…. uh oh, my hamstring locks up. I have to stop. I stop for a second, two. Gilbert goes quiet. Keep running, just keep running. Almost like it never happened, I’m back at pace again, but I know I can’t drop any bombs from here on in. Just maintain, don’t get greedy, be who you are.

I see my family again. Another fist pump, more energy. I feel like I’m shuffling but the Garmin says I’m staying consistent. A couple of turns and with each turn I feel my hamstring twinge. I’m careful now to take it easy on the turns. There’s an older guy in front of me, looks like the last guy I can catch. I’m slowly closing in. I’ve been trying to do calculations in my head for the last 5 miles but now it’s time to just run. I’m not gonna go any faster, but I feel like I could keep this pace for as long as necessary. The older guy is coming back to me now and I finally pass him. I’m not sure where the finish is but I’m sure it’s close. I’ve heard about the finish up a hill and I’m there now. I hear my name from above. I’m all alone.

I’m pumped when I cross the finish. I want to scream. F*** yeah! F*** yeah! F*** yeah! Not very graceful so I hold it in. I’m so, so grateful to have done this, expressed this. I walk around in a joyous daze, wanting to hold on to this feeling for as long as I can. I want to hold on to it even now. It’s a powerful thing. Spiritualizing such a physical event takes faith, work, practice, discipline, stamina, joy, but most of all it requires grace, and grace we have in abundance. By definition, unmerited love, grace is given freely. I’m grateful to have experienced it.

Official Results:

Garmin Splits:

1: 6:37
2: 6:15
3: 6:19
4: 6:28
5: 6:25
6: 6:16
7: 6:20
8: 6:15
9: 6:21
10: 6:22
11: 6:29
12: 6:28
13: 6:25
14: 6:25
15: 6:23
16: 6:20
17: 6:24
18: 6:19
19: 6:22
20: 6:26
21: 6:21
22: 6:23
23: 6:34
24: 6:30
25: 6:41
26: 6:27
26.5: 3:18
Avg: 6:25

Weather:

Time / temp /dew point/humidity
7:30 / 62.8 / 60.8 / 93%
8:01 / 63.9 / 61.8 / 93%
8:31 / 65.1 / 63.0 / 93%
9:01 / 66.1 / 64.0 / 93%
9:32 / 67.0/ 64.9 / 93%
10:02 / 68.7 / 65.7 / 90%
10:32 / 69.7 / 64.7 / 84%
11:02 / 70.6 / 64.8 / 82%
11:33 / 71.7 / 65.2 / 80%
12:03 / 73.1 / 65.5 / 77%
12:34 / 73.5 / 65.5 / 76%

The lead up to this race began before Boston, last year in fact. I signed up for Boston last fall, 2:50 on my mind, had an excellent autumn of training, set a 10K PR, then promptly crashed when it actually came time to train for Boston. My legs were cement, heart was stone, every workout sucked, every run was a struggle. My solution was to run more. I increased my mileage, doubled my double days. Somehow I went to Boston, ran a 2 minute PR and was sorely disappointed by the whole process. What I didn’t realize was that process laid the groundwork for this success.

And yes, of course, I consider the 2009 San Antonio Marathon a success. I’m happy with my time, 2:49:51. Moreso though, oh so moreseo, I enjoyed the process. After Boston I took time off from running, I reassessed training, commitment, motivation. We went to Europe and it changed everything. Running along the Seine, the Thames, The River Garonne revived my passion. I wasn’t training, wasn’t running every day, wasn’t even trying, but I was having my best workouts in a year. We came back for the summer and I ran when I wanted to run, rested when I didn’t. No longer a slave to the alarm, to the plan, I stopped keeping a log, stopped caring about Miles Per Week. I found a book that got me even more excited about the process. Need it be said that I was running better than ever? And I wasn’t even trying.

So of course, by regaining the process, I signed up for a race to measure the results. Oh the irony. And that’s the puritan story of how, after swearing off marathons for good at mile 10 of Boston, I came to sign up for the 2009 Rock ‘n Roll San Antonio Marathon and 1/2 Marathon in all it’s commercial glory a mere four months later.

After signing up, I was desperate not to lose the “innocence” as it were. I deliberately stayed away from Gazelle workouts, I purposely did shorter “long” runs, I often cut repetitions short. I wanted to keep not caring about the result, I wanted to keep enjoying the process. I had four months until the race, and in fact I hadn’t even committed to the full 26.2. I told myself, and others, that I signed up for the full but would run the half if the training didn’t go well.

The training went well. Peaked at maybe 75 mpw (not keeping track, remember?). Started taking a day off every week. Doubles when I wanted. My garmin broke but I found I enjoyed running with my son’s one-lap kid’s watch. Every workout was fun, my fitness felt phenomenal, and still I wasn’t really trying. If only I could bottle this, I didn’t want to lose the feeling. And of course as race day approached, the tyranny of the result started weighing on my shoulders, the process pushed aside, and I started struggling again.

So this last week I tried really hard to forget about obtaining a result and endeavored to remember the expression. The result is pressure, the process is an expression. Patience, desire, unselfishness, joy, stamina, love, passion. You don’t try to impress anyone, you don’t feel any pressure to perform, you don’t worry that you’re not good enough. You don’t even have to really do anything, you just have to be what you are … a good runner, a mediocre runner, one who runs, one who enjoys running.

And so yesterday, toes on the line, I thought to myself, “forget about time, remember the process. You’ve trained for this, you don’t have to do anything you’re not capable of, you just have to be who you are.”

To be continued…